Mom finds an undeposited check for $500 addressed to her daughter, sobs and berates her daughter for not giving her the money: ‘She said she could have used that $500 if I didn’t want it.’

Why does she feel like she’s entitled to her money anyway? 

It’s always good for adult children and their parents to keep a little distance as they age. I’m not saying that you should move to the other side of the country to get away from your mother if you don’t want to do that! I’m not even saying that it’s wrong to talk every day or even see each other multiple times a week. But it’s important to set boundaries so your parent isn’t treating you like a teenager or a child. 

Imagine if your mom went through your bank statement and criticized you for spending too much money on coffee. It would be one thing if you were struggling to maintain a budget and asking your mom for help, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about her going through your personal stuff without your permission and giving you unsolicited advice about how you should run your life. I don’t care how close you are with your mom; that is inappropriate in all circumstances. Many parents are unwilling to accept that they cannot control what their adult kids do with their lives and their money, and it drives them wild. 

The mom in this story feels entitled to her daughter’s money, which is one of the worst things a parent can be. It’s one thing if a parent is deeply struggling, and their adult child wants to help them out of the kindness of their heart, but I don’t think that’s the case here. The mom in this story went through her daughter’s things and found an old $500 check. She assumed that her daughter did not deposit the check and felt devastated because she (the mother) really wanted the money and could have used it for herself.