By the Author / Source: abuaram.site So many things terrify me—the fear of illness, the unknown future, the agonizing thought that my illness might burden those I love, the dread of being…
Author: MOHAMMAD
A Palestinian Without Hate: My Vision of the Jewish People as Kindred Spirits
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site I have never felt hatred toward Jews. Since childhood, I viewed them as fellow human beings and believed in the possibility of friendship between us. As…
Between the Clamor of Conscience and the Calm of Medication: A Journey in Search of the True ‘Self’
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site I suffer from a relentless sense of guilt whenever I try to distinguish right from wrong. A voice inside tells me that my recent actions have…
Between Relapse and the Harshness of Place: A Journey of Suffering inside Bethlehem Psychiatric Hospital
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site I have always harbored a deep dread of entering the psychiatric hospital. I was never admitted in a normal state; every time I was led there,…
Pleasure in the Depths of Madness: My Struggle with Psychiatric Medication and the Torment of Withdrawal
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site I believe psychiatric medications are still essential for me; without them, my condition would be catastrophic. In fact, I wouldn’t be able to think clearly, I’d…
Mysterious Phenomena Following Me: Intelligence Agencies, Aircraft, and Hidden Entities in My Life
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site I feel as though I have been watched since childhood up until this very day, with someone gathering information on every single aspect of my life….
Two Souls in One Body… and Three Children Who Fill My World
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site I have fathered three children, and I believe this number is completely sufficient. Yet, I sometimes feel a deep-seated desire to have more—occasionally even entertaining the…
Plumbing the Depths of Soul and Mind: My Journey in Balancing Treatment and Hidden Realms
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site It has been more than six months since I started taking my psychiatric medication. I feel remarkably better, and the concentration of mood-stabilizing medication in my…
Christian Rituals in the Life of an Atheist: How I Found Peace Away from the Islam of My Birth
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site Since my teenage years, I had been an atheist—and in truth, I was an atheist from childhood. I frequently mocked the teachings of Islam, finding them…
In the Gusts of Consciousness: A Twenty-Year Journey Between the Turbulence of Schizophrenia and the Mysteries of the Beyond
By the Author / Source: abuaram.site In many of my acute psychotic episodes—brief periods off medication accompanied by severe withdrawal symptoms and days of chronic insomnia—my mind was in a state of…