{"id":999,"date":"2026-07-23T15:10:46","date_gmt":"2026-07-23T15:10:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/?p=999"},"modified":"2026-07-23T15:10:54","modified_gmt":"2026-07-23T15:10:54","slug":"not-sick-with-the-world-but-sick-because-of-it-on-a-soul-unborn-to-affliction-and-a-world-that-corrupted-the-chemistry","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/not-sick-with-the-world-but-sick-because-of-it-on-a-soul-unborn-to-affliction-and-a-world-that-corrupted-the-chemistry\/","title":{"rendered":"Not Sick with the World, But Sick Because of It: On a Soul Unborn to Affliction, and a World That Corrupted the Chemistry"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"dev95-1494126524\" class=\"dev95-- dev95-entity-placement\"><script async=\"async\" data-cfasync=\"false\" src=\"https:\/\/pl27862732.effectivecpmnetwork.com\/2ad7a50e0bbc23ac6801d7b77c501463\/invoke.js\"><\/script>\r\n<div id=\"container-2ad7a50e0bbc23ac6801d7b77c501463\"><\/div><\/div>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By the Author \/ Source: <a href=\"https:\/\/abuaram.site\/\">abuaram.site<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">All my life, existence has been unduly harsh and unsparing toward me. I was not merely someone struggling in quiet adversity; rather, the world confronted me with unrelenting cruelty from every angle. My life was complex, laden with challenges and agonizing circumstances that deeply exhausted my mind and soul.<\/p><div id=\"dev95-3677156513\" class=\"dev95- dev95-entity-placement\"><center>\r\n<script>\r\n  atOptions = {\r\n    'key' : '4ba6b6513c00e0ba76511f798ae56401',\r\n    'format' : 'iframe',\r\n    'height' : 50,\r\n    'width' : 320,\r\n    'params' : {}\r\n  };\r\n<\/script>\r\n<script src=\"https:\/\/www.highperformanceformat.com\/4ba6b6513c00e0ba76511f798ae56401\/invoke.js\"><\/script>\r\n\r\n\t<\/center><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I am not even certain whether I was ill to begin with, or if the ruthless nature of this world from my very beginnings primed me to be consumed by affliction. Looking at my mind today, I doubt I was born sick. The illness remains distinct from who I am\u2014on one hand, I am afflicted, but on the other, my mind remains conscious and sound.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I am not entirely ill; rather, a separate, afflicted part of me is in constant conflict with my true self. This internal struggle often leaves me disoriented and lost, and it may lead others to perceive me as truly sick. At my core, I possess all the qualities of a psychologically and mentally sound individual, yet a secondary affliction continuously assaults me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">In its nature, my mind and psyche endure a pathological state, facing severe challenges and acute symptoms. Nevertheless, the conscious, sound part of me retains control, fully aware that its mind and psyche are undergoing a period of illness at that very moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">At times, I am profoundly affected and shaken by the intensity of this affliction, to the point where it manifests in pathological behavior that overshadows my natural psychological and mental state. In certain moments, I grow exhausted and act according to the illness, as it heavily weighs upon my soul and mind, making it nearly impossible to remain steadfast, endure, or appear whole.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It may well be that this world, or the sum of my life, is the very cause and catalyst of this affliction. A human being is a sensitive, emotional creature by nature, not a machine. Therefore, one requires specific, healthy conditions while growing up to avoid falling ill. Under the weight and accumulation of life\u2019s crushing burdens during formative years, one can easily succumb to psychological and mental distress, spiraling into the depths of their own soul.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Grounded in my psychological soundness, mental capabilities, and inner balance, I believe I was not born ill by nature or genetic predisposition. Rather, I see that the world I experienced pushed me to drown deeply in affliction, allowing it to take hold of me and become embedded in my existence, mind, and personality. I am not the world&#8217;s illness; I am ill <em>because<\/em> of this world.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The state of my brain chemistry is severely compromised, having deteriorated noticeably after I began taking psychiatric medications\u2014it was never this bad prior to them. Whenever I attempt to stop these medications, my brain chemistry falls into severe turmoil, giving rise to chronic mental states and symptoms that suggest my mind is inherently disordered and sick.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">In reality, my brain chemistry was fine throughout my life; it was acceptable, capable of survival, adaptation, and finding the right conditions for a normal life, provided there was proper guidance and awareness. Even though I endured illness, severe trauma, and grueling circumstances, my mind was fully capable of preserving its own sanity, for it is naturally sound by design.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I cannot simply stop my psychiatric medications now to judge my true mental state, as withdrawal would undoubtedly trigger severe mental turmoil. This disturbance would not stem from my original condition, but rather from the contamination, dependence, and withdrawal associated with these drugs. Having used them for so many years, reclaiming my original, natural mental state has become an intricate and daunting task.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It would be a profound relief, in my current state of awareness, to completely and safely detoxify from these medications and rely solely on my own mind. It would be a wonderful experience, yet it has become virtually impossible. There is no easy way out of this vortex once entered; I cannot even embark on the path of tapering off, as the matter is deeply complex and perhaps impossible from the start.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">None of it matters anymore. I no longer wish to prove anything to myself, nor do I need further suffering; none of this holds inherent value anyway. It is a miserable life, and even if I must continue it with these psychiatric medications, what truly matters now is attaining peace and finding happiness and pleasure in this damned existence. These are all inevitable fates.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yet, the silver lining is that I am fully aware of my own worth and the value of my mind despite it all. I know I deserve complete self-appreciation and respect, unclouded by feelings of flaw or impurity. It is a blessing to understand the truth of who we are, to recognize the reality of our minds, and to claim our true place in life, so we never remain lost in a space where we cannot define ourselves.<\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div><p id=\"pvc_stats_999\" class=\"pvc_stats total_only\" data-element-id=\"999\" style=\"\"><i class=\"pvc-stats-icon medium\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" version=\"1.0\" viewbox=\"0 0 502 315\" preserveaspectratio=\"xMidYMid meet\"><g transform=\"translate(0,332) scale(0.1,-0.1)\" fill=\"\" stroke=\"none\"><path d=\"M2394 3279 l-29 -30 -3 -207 c-2 -182 0 -211 15 -242 39 -76 157 -76 196 0 15 31 17 60 15 243 l-3 209 -33 29 c-26 23 -41 29 -80 29 -41 0 -53 -5 -78 -31z\"\/><path d=\"M3085 3251 c-45 -19 -58 -50 -96 -229 -47 -217 -49 -260 -13 -295 52 -53 146 -42 177 20 16 31 87 366 87 410 0 70 -86 122 -155 94z\"\/><path d=\"M1751 3234 c-13 -9 -29 -31 -37 -50 -12 -29 -10 -49 21 -204 19 -94 39 -189 45 -210 14 -50 54 -80 110 -80 34 0 48 6 76 34 21 21 34 44 34 59 0 14 -18 113 -40 219 -37 178 -43 195 -70 221 -36 32 -101 37 -139 11z\"\/><path d=\"M1163 3073 c-36 -7 -73 -59 -73 -102 0 -56 133 -378 171 -413 34 -32 83 -37 129 -13 70 36 67 87 -16 290 -86 209 -89 214 -129 231 -35 14 -42 15 -82 7z\"\/><path d=\"M3689 3066 c-15 -9 -33 -30 -42 -48 -48 -103 -147 -355 -147 -375 0 -98 131 -148 192 -74 13 15 57 108 97 206 80 196 84 226 37 273 -30 30 -99 39 -137 18z\"\/><path d=\"M583 2784 c-38 -19 -67 -74 -58 -113 9 -42 211 -354 242 -373 16 -10 45 -18 66 -18 51 0 107 52 107 100 0 39 -1 41 -124 234 -80 126 -108 162 -133 173 -41 17 -61 16 -100 -3z\"\/><path d=\"M4250 2784 c-14 -9 -74 -91 -133 -183 -95 -150 -107 -173 -107 -213 0 -55 33 -94 87 -104 67 -13 90 8 211 198 130 202 137 225 78 284 -27 27 -42 34 -72 34 -22 0 -50 -8 -64 -16z\"\/><path d=\"M2275 2693 c-553 -48 -1095 -270 -1585 -649 -135 -104 -459 -423 -483 -476 -23 -49 -22 -139 2 -186 73 -142 361 -457 571 -626 285 -228 642 -407 990 -497 242 -63 336 -73 660 -74 310 0 370 5 595 52 535 111 1045 392 1455 803 122 121 250 273 275 326 19 41 19 137 0 174 -41 79 -309 363 -465 492 -447 370 -946 591 -1479 653 -113 14 -422 18 -536 8z m395 -428 c171 -34 330 -124 456 -258 112 -119 167 -219 211 -378 27 -96 24 -300 -5 -401 -72 -255 -236 -447 -474 -557 -132 -62 -201 -76 -368 -76 -167 0 -236 14 -368 76 -213 98 -373 271 -451 485 -162 444 86 934 547 1084 153 49 292 57 452 25z m909 -232 c222 -123 408 -262 593 -441 76 -74 138 -139 138 -144 0 -16 -233 -242 -330 -319 -155 -123 -309 -223 -461 -299 l-81 -41 32 46 c18 26 49 83 70 128 143 306 141 649 -6 957 -25 52 -61 116 -79 142 l-34 47 45 -20 c26 -10 76 -36 113 -56z m-2057 25 c-40 -58 -105 -190 -130 -263 -110 -324 -59 -707 132 -981 25 -35 42 -64 37 -64 -19 0 -241 119 -326 174 -188 122 -406 314 -532 468 l-58 71 108 103 c185 178 428 349 672 473 66 33 121 60 123 61 2 0 -10 -19 -26 -42z\"\/><path d=\"M2375 1950 c-198 -44 -350 -190 -395 -379 -18 -76 -8 -221 19 -290 114 -284 457 -406 731 -260 98 52 188 154 231 260 27 69 37 214 19 290 -38 163 -166 304 -326 360 -67 23 -215 33 -279 19z\"\/><\/g><\/svg><\/i> <img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" alt=\"Loading\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dev95.site\/wp-content\/plugins\/page-views-count\/ajax-loader-2x.gif?resize=16%2C16&#038;ssl=1\" border=\"0\" \/><\/p><div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By the Author \/ Source: abuaram.site All my life, existence has been unduly harsh and unsparing toward me. I was not merely someone struggling in quiet adversity; rather, the world confronted me&#8230;<\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>\n<p id=\"pvc_stats_999\" class=\"pvc_stats total_only\" data-element-id=\"999\" style=\"\"><i class=\"pvc-stats-icon medium\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" version=\"1.0\" viewbox=\"0 0 502 315\" preserveaspectratio=\"xMidYMid meet\"><g transform=\"translate(0,332) scale(0.1,-0.1)\" fill=\"\" stroke=\"none\"><path d=\"M2394 3279 l-29 -30 -3 -207 c-2 -182 0 -211 15 -242 39 -76 157 -76 196 0 15 31 17 60 15 243 l-3 209 -33 29 c-26 23 -41 29 -80 29 -41 0 -53 -5 -78 -31z\"\/><path d=\"M3085 3251 c-45 -19 -58 -50 -96 -229 -47 -217 -49 -260 -13 -295 52 -53 146 -42 177 20 16 31 87 366 87 410 0 70 -86 122 -155 94z\"\/><path d=\"M1751 3234 c-13 -9 -29 -31 -37 -50 -12 -29 -10 -49 21 -204 19 -94 39 -189 45 -210 14 -50 54 -80 110 -80 34 0 48 6 76 34 21 21 34 44 34 59 0 14 -18 113 -40 219 -37 178 -43 195 -70 221 -36 32 -101 37 -139 11z\"\/><path d=\"M1163 3073 c-36 -7 -73 -59 -73 -102 0 -56 133 -378 171 -413 34 -32 83 -37 129 -13 70 36 67 87 -16 290 -86 209 -89 214 -129 231 -35 14 -42 15 -82 7z\"\/><path d=\"M3689 3066 c-15 -9 -33 -30 -42 -48 -48 -103 -147 -355 -147 -375 0 -98 131 -148 192 -74 13 15 57 108 97 206 80 196 84 226 37 273 -30 30 -99 39 -137 18z\"\/><path d=\"M583 2784 c-38 -19 -67 -74 -58 -113 9 -42 211 -354 242 -373 16 -10 45 -18 66 -18 51 0 107 52 107 100 0 39 -1 41 -124 234 -80 126 -108 162 -133 173 -41 17 -61 16 -100 -3z\"\/><path d=\"M4250 2784 c-14 -9 -74 -91 -133 -183 -95 -150 -107 -173 -107 -213 0 -55 33 -94 87 -104 67 -13 90 8 211 198 130 202 137 225 78 284 -27 27 -42 34 -72 34 -22 0 -50 -8 -64 -16z\"\/><path d=\"M2275 2693 c-553 -48 -1095 -270 -1585 -649 -135 -104 -459 -423 -483 -476 -23 -49 -22 -139 2 -186 73 -142 361 -457 571 -626 285 -228 642 -407 990 -497 242 -63 336 -73 660 -74 310 0 370 5 595 52 535 111 1045 392 1455 803 122 121 250 273 275 326 19 41 19 137 0 174 -41 79 -309 363 -465 492 -447 370 -946 591 -1479 653 -113 14 -422 18 -536 8z m395 -428 c171 -34 330 -124 456 -258 112 -119 167 -219 211 -378 27 -96 24 -300 -5 -401 -72 -255 -236 -447 -474 -557 -132 -62 -201 -76 -368 -76 -167 0 -236 14 -368 76 -213 98 -373 271 -451 485 -162 444 86 934 547 1084 153 49 292 57 452 25z m909 -232 c222 -123 408 -262 593 -441 76 -74 138 -139 138 -144 0 -16 -233 -242 -330 -319 -155 -123 -309 -223 -461 -299 l-81 -41 32 46 c18 26 49 83 70 128 143 306 141 649 -6 957 -25 52 -61 116 -79 142 l-34 47 45 -20 c26 -10 76 -36 113 -56z m-2057 25 c-40 -58 -105 -190 -130 -263 -110 -324 -59 -707 132 -981 25 -35 42 -64 37 -64 -19 0 -241 119 -326 174 -188 122 -406 314 -532 468 l-58 71 108 103 c185 178 428 349 672 473 66 33 121 60 123 61 2 0 -10 -19 -26 -42z\"\/><path d=\"M2375 1950 c-198 -44 -350 -190 -395 -379 -18 -76 -8 -221 19 -290 114 -284 457 -406 731 -260 98 52 188 154 231 260 27 69 37 214 19 290 -38 163 -166 304 -326 360 -67 23 -215 33 -279 19z\"\/><\/g><\/svg><\/i> <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" alt=\"Loading\" src=\"https:\/\/dev95.site\/wp-content\/plugins\/page-views-count\/ajax-loader-2x.gif\" border=\"0\" \/><\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fp_fajr_begins":"","fp_fajr_iqamah":"","fp_dhuhr_begins":"","fp_dhuhr_iqamah":"","fp_asr_begins":"","fp_asr_iqamah":"","fp_maghrib_begins":"","fp_maghrib_iqamah":"","fp_isha_begins":"","fp_isha_iqamah":"","fp_midnight":"","fp_midnight_name":"","fp_sunrise":"","fp_single_prayer_begins_title":"","fp_single_prayer_iqamah_title":"","fp_prayer_times_for_today":"","fp_hijra_date":"","fp_fajr_name":"","fp_dhuhr_name":"","fp_asr_name":"","fp_maghrib_name":"","fp_isha_name":"","fp_sunrise_name":"","fp_currentDate":"","fp_current_time":"","fp_current_title":"","fp_current_location":"","fp_masjid_name":"","fp_prayer_title":"","fp_next_prayer_iqamah_time":"","fp_next_prayer_iqamah_title":"","fp_next_prayer_begins_time":"","fp_next_prayer_begins_title":"","fp_next_prayer_title":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[37],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-999","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-posts"],"a3_pvc":{"activated":true,"total_views":14,"today_views":0},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.3 - 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I was not merely someone struggling in quiet adversity; rather, the world confronted me with unrelenting cruelty from every angle. My life was complex, laden with challenges and agonizing circumstances that deeply exhausted my mind and soul.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/not-sick-with-the-world-but-sick-because-of-it-on-a-soul-unborn-to-affliction-and-a-world-that-corrupted-the-chemistry\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ar_AR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Not Sick with the World, But Sick Because of It: On a Soul Unborn to Affliction, and a World That Corrupted the Chemistry - Dev95\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"All my life, existence has been unduly harsh and unsparing toward me. 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