{"id":1149,"date":"2026-08-28T10:24:16","date_gmt":"2026-08-28T10:24:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/?p=1149"},"modified":"2026-08-28T10:24:26","modified_gmt":"2026-08-28T10:24:26","slug":"walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\/","title":{"rendered":"Walls of Memory: How Homes Shaped My Schizophrenia&#8230; and When Trauma Distorted a Child&#8217;s Consciousness"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"dev95-4273970910\" class=\"dev95-- dev95-entity-placement\"><script async=\"async\" data-cfasync=\"false\" src=\"https:\/\/pl27862732.effectivecpmnetwork.com\/2ad7a50e0bbc23ac6801d7b77c501463\/invoke.js\"><\/script>\r\n<div id=\"container-2ad7a50e0bbc23ac6801d7b77c501463\"><\/div><\/div>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By the Author \/ Source: <a href=\"https:\/\/abuaram.site\/\">abuaram.site<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Early in my life, as a young child, I lived with my family in my late father&#8217;s house. I left that home when I was eight years old. The reason was my father&#8217;s brother\u2014my uncle, who is still alive today at 70 years old\u2014and his children. They treated us terribly, and constant conflict broke out between our families, culminating in his ill son stabbing my mother&#8217;s hand with a sharp knife right before my eyes when I was only seven or eight. That ordeal left me deeply traumatized and terrified, sending me into severe crying fits over my mother. I believe that incident, along with another around that time, altered my young consciousness and set the stage for schizophrenia. I was an innocent child, and I know that amidst my mental disorientation and descent into deep despair, that event was the root of a form of schizophrenia within me. It completely distorted my personality\u2014a vengeful schizophrenia born of victimhood&#8217;s pain, stealing my innocent thoughts to turn me into a man while I was still just a little boy.<\/p><div id=\"dev95-3081258576\" class=\"dev95- dev95-entity-placement\"><center>\r\n<script>\r\n  atOptions = {\r\n    'key' : '4ba6b6513c00e0ba76511f798ae56401',\r\n    'format' : 'iframe',\r\n    'height' : 50,\r\n    'width' : 320,\r\n    'params' : {}\r\n  };\r\n<\/script>\r\n<script src=\"https:\/\/www.highperformanceformat.com\/4ba6b6513c00e0ba76511f798ae56401\/invoke.js\"><\/script>\r\n\r\n\t<\/center><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The trauma reshaped my awareness and shattered my thinking, making me far more vulnerable to chronic schizophrenia. This might sound like an exaggeration, but for such a young child, an event like that made illness inevitable. Throughout my life, after leaving our first home where my siblings and I were born\u2014with my mother taking care of us alone\u2014I moved with my small family through numerous rented apartments across different residential buildings. Being the eldest son, I always felt the weight of being the man of the house, which led to frequent clashes with neighbors. The apartments were crammed together, and I suffered through grueling psychological and emotional episodes. I would drink and play loud music, and neighbors constantly confronted me over the noise I caused in those large, crowded complexes. Every time I moved to a new place, I heard voices in my head urging me to leave. My mother protected me for a while, explaining my condition to them. I received treatment in various care facilities before eventually moving on to yet another home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By chance, four years ago, I returned to the very house where I was born, and I still live there today. The same people from my childhood still live in the neighborhood, in the houses right next to mine. I returned out of necessity: I needed a home of my own. I lacked the money to buy a proper house and could no longer afford rent. I was exhausted from shared living spaces; I had come to resent everyone. The home I live in now is detached\u2014a standalone house with no one living above, below, or directly attached. Though the neighboring houses are close, it is still far better than an apartment in a building, and certainly more comfortable. I have been living there safely with my wife and children for nearly five years now!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The presence that took hold of my mind as a person living with schizophrenia\u2014hearing, seeing, and sensing spirits around me\u2014first appeared in one of those apartments where I had caused so much noise and conflict. I was already suffering from schizophrenia, but it transformed into this form there, and it has not left me to this day. I still believe that these spirits were brought upon me through the actions of people around me who knew me. Alongside this, I endured other harsh experiences after leaving our first home, between the ages of eight and fourteen, including childhood bullying and severe beatings in the streets. All of this worsened my condition until I reached a breaking point. I became severely ill in those rented homes during my adolescence, and as further complications escalated, it eventually led me to seek treatment.<\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div><p id=\"pvc_stats_1149\" class=\"pvc_stats total_only\" data-element-id=\"1149\" style=\"\"><i class=\"pvc-stats-icon medium\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" version=\"1.0\" viewbox=\"0 0 502 315\" preserveaspectratio=\"xMidYMid meet\"><g transform=\"translate(0,332) scale(0.1,-0.1)\" fill=\"\" stroke=\"none\"><path d=\"M2394 3279 l-29 -30 -3 -207 c-2 -182 0 -211 15 -242 39 -76 157 -76 196 0 15 31 17 60 15 243 l-3 209 -33 29 c-26 23 -41 29 -80 29 -41 0 -53 -5 -78 -31z\"\/><path d=\"M3085 3251 c-45 -19 -58 -50 -96 -229 -47 -217 -49 -260 -13 -295 52 -53 146 -42 177 20 16 31 87 366 87 410 0 70 -86 122 -155 94z\"\/><path d=\"M1751 3234 c-13 -9 -29 -31 -37 -50 -12 -29 -10 -49 21 -204 19 -94 39 -189 45 -210 14 -50 54 -80 110 -80 34 0 48 6 76 34 21 21 34 44 34 59 0 14 -18 113 -40 219 -37 178 -43 195 -70 221 -36 32 -101 37 -139 11z\"\/><path d=\"M1163 3073 c-36 -7 -73 -59 -73 -102 0 -56 133 -378 171 -413 34 -32 83 -37 129 -13 70 36 67 87 -16 290 -86 209 -89 214 -129 231 -35 14 -42 15 -82 7z\"\/><path d=\"M3689 3066 c-15 -9 -33 -30 -42 -48 -48 -103 -147 -355 -147 -375 0 -98 131 -148 192 -74 13 15 57 108 97 206 80 196 84 226 37 273 -30 30 -99 39 -137 18z\"\/><path d=\"M583 2784 c-38 -19 -67 -74 -58 -113 9 -42 211 -354 242 -373 16 -10 45 -18 66 -18 51 0 107 52 107 100 0 39 -1 41 -124 234 -80 126 -108 162 -133 173 -41 17 -61 16 -100 -3z\"\/><path d=\"M4250 2784 c-14 -9 -74 -91 -133 -183 -95 -150 -107 -173 -107 -213 0 -55 33 -94 87 -104 67 -13 90 8 211 198 130 202 137 225 78 284 -27 27 -42 34 -72 34 -22 0 -50 -8 -64 -16z\"\/><path d=\"M2275 2693 c-553 -48 -1095 -270 -1585 -649 -135 -104 -459 -423 -483 -476 -23 -49 -22 -139 2 -186 73 -142 361 -457 571 -626 285 -228 642 -407 990 -497 242 -63 336 -73 660 -74 310 0 370 5 595 52 535 111 1045 392 1455 803 122 121 250 273 275 326 19 41 19 137 0 174 -41 79 -309 363 -465 492 -447 370 -946 591 -1479 653 -113 14 -422 18 -536 8z m395 -428 c171 -34 330 -124 456 -258 112 -119 167 -219 211 -378 27 -96 24 -300 -5 -401 -72 -255 -236 -447 -474 -557 -132 -62 -201 -76 -368 -76 -167 0 -236 14 -368 76 -213 98 -373 271 -451 485 -162 444 86 934 547 1084 153 49 292 57 452 25z m909 -232 c222 -123 408 -262 593 -441 76 -74 138 -139 138 -144 0 -16 -233 -242 -330 -319 -155 -123 -309 -223 -461 -299 l-81 -41 32 46 c18 26 49 83 70 128 143 306 141 649 -6 957 -25 52 -61 116 -79 142 l-34 47 45 -20 c26 -10 76 -36 113 -56z m-2057 25 c-40 -58 -105 -190 -130 -263 -110 -324 -59 -707 132 -981 25 -35 42 -64 37 -64 -19 0 -241 119 -326 174 -188 122 -406 314 -532 468 l-58 71 108 103 c185 178 428 349 672 473 66 33 121 60 123 61 2 0 -10 -19 -26 -42z\"\/><path d=\"M2375 1950 c-198 -44 -350 -190 -395 -379 -18 -76 -8 -221 19 -290 114 -284 457 -406 731 -260 98 52 188 154 231 260 27 69 37 214 19 290 -38 163 -166 304 -326 360 -67 23 -215 33 -279 19z\"\/><\/g><\/svg><\/i> <img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" alt=\"Loading\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dev95.site\/wp-content\/plugins\/page-views-count\/ajax-loader-2x.gif?resize=16%2C16&#038;ssl=1\" border=\"0\" \/><\/p><div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By the Author \/ Source: abuaram.site Early in my life, as a young child, I lived with my family in my late father&#8217;s house. I left that home when I was eight&#8230;<\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>\n<p id=\"pvc_stats_1149\" class=\"pvc_stats total_only\" data-element-id=\"1149\" style=\"\"><i class=\"pvc-stats-icon medium\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" version=\"1.0\" viewbox=\"0 0 502 315\" preserveaspectratio=\"xMidYMid meet\"><g transform=\"translate(0,332) scale(0.1,-0.1)\" fill=\"\" stroke=\"none\"><path d=\"M2394 3279 l-29 -30 -3 -207 c-2 -182 0 -211 15 -242 39 -76 157 -76 196 0 15 31 17 60 15 243 l-3 209 -33 29 c-26 23 -41 29 -80 29 -41 0 -53 -5 -78 -31z\"\/><path d=\"M3085 3251 c-45 -19 -58 -50 -96 -229 -47 -217 -49 -260 -13 -295 52 -53 146 -42 177 20 16 31 87 366 87 410 0 70 -86 122 -155 94z\"\/><path d=\"M1751 3234 c-13 -9 -29 -31 -37 -50 -12 -29 -10 -49 21 -204 19 -94 39 -189 45 -210 14 -50 54 -80 110 -80 34 0 48 6 76 34 21 21 34 44 34 59 0 14 -18 113 -40 219 -37 178 -43 195 -70 221 -36 32 -101 37 -139 11z\"\/><path d=\"M1163 3073 c-36 -7 -73 -59 -73 -102 0 -56 133 -378 171 -413 34 -32 83 -37 129 -13 70 36 67 87 -16 290 -86 209 -89 214 -129 231 -35 14 -42 15 -82 7z\"\/><path d=\"M3689 3066 c-15 -9 -33 -30 -42 -48 -48 -103 -147 -355 -147 -375 0 -98 131 -148 192 -74 13 15 57 108 97 206 80 196 84 226 37 273 -30 30 -99 39 -137 18z\"\/><path d=\"M583 2784 c-38 -19 -67 -74 -58 -113 9 -42 211 -354 242 -373 16 -10 45 -18 66 -18 51 0 107 52 107 100 0 39 -1 41 -124 234 -80 126 -108 162 -133 173 -41 17 -61 16 -100 -3z\"\/><path d=\"M4250 2784 c-14 -9 -74 -91 -133 -183 -95 -150 -107 -173 -107 -213 0 -55 33 -94 87 -104 67 -13 90 8 211 198 130 202 137 225 78 284 -27 27 -42 34 -72 34 -22 0 -50 -8 -64 -16z\"\/><path d=\"M2275 2693 c-553 -48 -1095 -270 -1585 -649 -135 -104 -459 -423 -483 -476 -23 -49 -22 -139 2 -186 73 -142 361 -457 571 -626 285 -228 642 -407 990 -497 242 -63 336 -73 660 -74 310 0 370 5 595 52 535 111 1045 392 1455 803 122 121 250 273 275 326 19 41 19 137 0 174 -41 79 -309 363 -465 492 -447 370 -946 591 -1479 653 -113 14 -422 18 -536 8z m395 -428 c171 -34 330 -124 456 -258 112 -119 167 -219 211 -378 27 -96 24 -300 -5 -401 -72 -255 -236 -447 -474 -557 -132 -62 -201 -76 -368 -76 -167 0 -236 14 -368 76 -213 98 -373 271 -451 485 -162 444 86 934 547 1084 153 49 292 57 452 25z m909 -232 c222 -123 408 -262 593 -441 76 -74 138 -139 138 -144 0 -16 -233 -242 -330 -319 -155 -123 -309 -223 -461 -299 l-81 -41 32 46 c18 26 49 83 70 128 143 306 141 649 -6 957 -25 52 -61 116 -79 142 l-34 47 45 -20 c26 -10 76 -36 113 -56z m-2057 25 c-40 -58 -105 -190 -130 -263 -110 -324 -59 -707 132 -981 25 -35 42 -64 37 -64 -19 0 -241 119 -326 174 -188 122 -406 314 -532 468 l-58 71 108 103 c185 178 428 349 672 473 66 33 121 60 123 61 2 0 -10 -19 -26 -42z\"\/><path d=\"M2375 1950 c-198 -44 -350 -190 -395 -379 -18 -76 -8 -221 19 -290 114 -284 457 -406 731 -260 98 52 188 154 231 260 27 69 37 214 19 290 -38 163 -166 304 -326 360 -67 23 -215 33 -279 19z\"\/><\/g><\/svg><\/i> <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" alt=\"Loading\" src=\"https:\/\/dev95.site\/wp-content\/plugins\/page-views-count\/ajax-loader-2x.gif\" border=\"0\" \/><\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fp_fajr_begins":"","fp_fajr_iqamah":"","fp_dhuhr_begins":"","fp_dhuhr_iqamah":"","fp_asr_begins":"","fp_asr_iqamah":"","fp_maghrib_begins":"","fp_maghrib_iqamah":"","fp_isha_begins":"","fp_isha_iqamah":"","fp_midnight":"","fp_midnight_name":"","fp_sunrise":"","fp_single_prayer_begins_title":"","fp_single_prayer_iqamah_title":"","fp_prayer_times_for_today":"","fp_hijra_date":"","fp_fajr_name":"","fp_dhuhr_name":"","fp_asr_name":"","fp_maghrib_name":"","fp_isha_name":"","fp_sunrise_name":"","fp_currentDate":"","fp_current_time":"","fp_current_title":"","fp_current_location":"","fp_masjid_name":"","fp_prayer_title":"","fp_next_prayer_iqamah_time":"","fp_next_prayer_iqamah_title":"","fp_next_prayer_begins_time":"","fp_next_prayer_begins_title":"","fp_next_prayer_title":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[37],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1149","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-posts"],"a3_pvc":{"activated":true,"total_views":1,"today_views":1},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Walls of Memory: How Homes Shaped My Schizophrenia... and When Trauma Distorted a Child&#039;s Consciousness - Dev95<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Early in my life, as a young child, I lived with my family in my late father&#039;s house. I left that home when I was eight years old. The reason was my father&#039;s brother\u2014my uncle, who is still alive today at 70 years old\u2014and his children. They treated us terribly, and constant conflict broke out between our families, culminating in his ill son stabbing my mother&#039;s hand with a sharp knife right before my eyes when I was only seven or eight. That ordeal left me deeply traumatized and terrified, sending me into severe crying fits over my mother. I believe that incident, along with another around that time, altered my young consciousness and set the stage for schizophrenia. I was an innocent child, and I know that amidst my mental disorientation and descent into deep despair, that event was the root of a form of schizophrenia within me. It completely distorted my personality\u2014a vengeful schizophrenia born of victimhood&#039;s pain, stealing my innocent thoughts to turn me into a man while I was still just a little boy.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ar_AR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Walls of Memory: How Homes Shaped My Schizophrenia... and When Trauma Distorted a Child&#039;s Consciousness - Dev95\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Early in my life, as a young child, I lived with my family in my late father&#039;s house. I left that home when I was eight years old. The reason was my father&#039;s brother\u2014my uncle, who is still alive today at 70 years old\u2014and his children. They treated us terribly, and constant conflict broke out between our families, culminating in his ill son stabbing my mother&#039;s hand with a sharp knife right before my eyes when I was only seven or eight. That ordeal left me deeply traumatized and terrified, sending me into severe crying fits over my mother. I believe that incident, along with another around that time, altered my young consciousness and set the stage for schizophrenia. I was an innocent child, and I know that amidst my mental disorientation and descent into deep despair, that event was the root of a form of schizophrenia within me. It completely distorted my personality\u2014a vengeful schizophrenia born of victimhood&#039;s pain, stealing my innocent thoughts to turn me into a man while I was still just a little boy.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Dev95\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-08-28T10:24:16+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-08-28T10:24:26+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"MOHAMMAD\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"\u0643\u064f\u062a\u0628 \u0628\u0648\u0627\u0633\u0637\u0629\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"MOHAMMAD\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"\u0648\u0642\u062a \u0627\u0644\u0642\u0631\u0627\u0621\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u0645\u064f\u0642\u062f\u0651\u0631\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 \u062f\u0642\u0627\u0626\u0642\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"MOHAMMAD\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/b807805ffe2916206b04d0938bce0298\"},\"headline\":\"Walls of Memory: How Homes Shaped My Schizophrenia&#8230; and When Trauma Distorted a Child&#8217;s Consciousness\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-08-28T10:24:16+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-08-28T10:24:26+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":661,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#organization\"},\"articleSection\":[\"Posts\"],\"inLanguage\":\"ar\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/walls-of-memory-how-homes-shaped-my-schizophrenia-and-when-trauma-distorted-a-childs-consciousness\\\/\",\"name\":\"Walls of Memory: How Homes Shaped My Schizophrenia... and When Trauma Distorted a Child's Consciousness - Dev95\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2026-08-28T10:24:16+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-08-28T10:24:26+00:00\",\"description\":\"Early in my life, as a young child, I lived with my family in my late father's house. 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