{"id":1052,"date":"2026-07-31T11:47:09","date_gmt":"2026-07-31T11:47:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/?p=1052"},"modified":"2026-07-31T11:47:21","modified_gmt":"2026-07-31T11:47:21","slug":"the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/","title":{"rendered":"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"dev95-119265016\" class=\"dev95-- dev95-entity-placement\"><script async=\"async\" data-cfasync=\"false\" src=\"https:\/\/pl27862732.effectivecpmnetwork.com\/2ad7a50e0bbc23ac6801d7b77c501463\/invoke.js\"><\/script>\r\n<div id=\"container-2ad7a50e0bbc23ac6801d7b77c501463\"><\/div><\/div>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By the Author \/ Source: <a href=\"https:\/\/abuaram.site\/\">abuaram.site<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">These days, I recall my suicide attempt that took place several years ago. It was my first attempt, even though suicidal thoughts had crossed my mind at many points in my life. Nevertheless, that was the only time I actually went through with it.<\/p><div id=\"dev95-2243608838\" class=\"dev95- dev95-entity-placement\"><center>\r\n<script>\r\n  atOptions = {\r\n    'key' : '4ba6b6513c00e0ba76511f798ae56401',\r\n    'format' : 'iframe',\r\n    'height' : 50,\r\n    'width' : 320,\r\n    'params' : {}\r\n  };\r\n<\/script>\r\n<script src=\"https:\/\/www.highperformanceformat.com\/4ba6b6513c00e0ba76511f798ae56401\/invoke.js\"><\/script>\r\n\r\n\t<\/center><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">On the day I attempted suicide, I had been off my psychiatric medication for a while. I was suffering from chronic schizophrenia at the time, and my mental state was severely deteriorating; numerous voices were whispering to me, both around me and within me. I was living in a world completely detached from reality, consumed by overwhelming feelings of deep depression, with advanced symptoms of schizophrenia at their absolute peak.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Back then, my daughter, Angie, was my only child and barely two years old. She and her mother were sleeping past midnight, while I sat alone, awake, suffering and lost in thought. After days of deliberation, the idea of suicide struck me that night.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I found no way to commit suicide except through poison or medication; I lacked the courage to resort to another gruesome method, nor did I possess a firearm to put a bullet through my head on that wretched night. I gathered every available medication in the house and subconsciously began swallowing pill after pill\u2014psychiatric drugs, stimulants, painkillers, and fever reducers. I believe I far exceeded the prescribed doses at the time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When I finished taking the pills, I sat on the couch and was gripped by profound fear, feeling as though I was about to lose consciousness or die. Shocked by what I had just ingested, voices of weeping and reproach suddenly echoed in my head and around me, as if blaming me for what I had done. My wife and daughter were still asleep. After some time passed, severe nausea took over, followed by vomiting and intense diarrhea. I felt as if I were slipping into another world; my perception was warped to the point where my breathing felt like a vast, giant corridor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When my wife woke up and I told her what I had done, she panicked and broke down in tears, shocked. She wanted to call emergency services to take me to the hospital, but I refused and told her that nothing had happened. In reality, hours of nausea, vomiting, and severe diarrhea passed, but I never lost consciousness. Fortunately, the attempt failed, and I survived without any lasting physical complications.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I feel deep regret for what I did that night, and it saddens me to have reached such a low point in my life. Truthfully, suicide was never my genuine desire; it was the result of severe illness and the complete absence of normal consciousness. I committed that act while suffering from acute schizophrenia and severe depression. For a while after that attempt, the phantom of death haunted me; voices from another world crept into my mind, scolding and holding me accountable for my grave mistake against myself. I am truly remorseful, and to my deepest regret, I never want to attempt suicide again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is tragic that I stop taking my medications at certain stages of my life; stopping allows the illness to return and pull me back into a dark, terrible abyss\u2014one extremely dangerous to my mental and psychological health. Currently, after about a month and a half of consistently taking my medication, I realized I held misconceptions about it. I feel infinitely better when I am on my treatment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When I stop taking my medication, my condition worsens severely; my mind and soul endure continuous torment. My mind becomes deeply unwell and exhausted, and my mood and mental state plummet. My ability to use sound cognitive functions and perceive reality with clarity becomes impaired. Therefore, it is profoundly unfair to leave my mind and psyche untreated. Furthermore, if I stay off medication for too long, I might unconsciously hurt myself through suicide, harm myself in other ways, or perhaps bring harm to those around me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is tragic to let my mind drift away with the illness. Medication is not bad for someone like me who suffers from a chronic mental condition without it. Right now, I feel my mind is in a much better place. I have begun returning to reality and work; my mind is functioning normally\u2014even better than before. I can think clearly and organize my affairs with greater logic and intellect. The fear, intrusive thoughts, and anxious feelings have subsided, and my overall mood is good; I barely feel that agonizing depression. This proves that my mental state degrades and loses all these positive aspects whenever I abandon my medication.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">To those who feel resentment toward taking medication despite needing it, I want to say that you are mistaken and may hold flawed beliefs about psychiatric drugs\u2014though not all medications are equally beneficial. Even those suffering from depression alone need medication; depression is cruel and deeply painful to the soul and mind. Imagine, then, the state of someone dealing with a chronic mental condition like severe schizophrenia, where living without treatment is simply impossible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Medication may not be a magic cure, but it plays a massive role in your recovery, enabling you to pursue full healing far more effectively if that is your goal. Most importantly, it spares you from suffering terrible, dangerous psychological and mental symptoms that could blindly lead you to suicide or losing your life\u2014something you do not truly want. Remember that your condition after quitting medication will be much worse, so do not assume you will be better off without it; the medication is not as bad as you think. My three medications are effective, and thanks to them, my mind is blessed with stability once again.<\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div><p id=\"pvc_stats_1052\" class=\"pvc_stats total_only\" data-element-id=\"1052\" style=\"\"><i class=\"pvc-stats-icon medium\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" version=\"1.0\" viewbox=\"0 0 502 315\" preserveaspectratio=\"xMidYMid meet\"><g transform=\"translate(0,332) scale(0.1,-0.1)\" fill=\"\" stroke=\"none\"><path d=\"M2394 3279 l-29 -30 -3 -207 c-2 -182 0 -211 15 -242 39 -76 157 -76 196 0 15 31 17 60 15 243 l-3 209 -33 29 c-26 23 -41 29 -80 29 -41 0 -53 -5 -78 -31z\"\/><path d=\"M3085 3251 c-45 -19 -58 -50 -96 -229 -47 -217 -49 -260 -13 -295 52 -53 146 -42 177 20 16 31 87 366 87 410 0 70 -86 122 -155 94z\"\/><path d=\"M1751 3234 c-13 -9 -29 -31 -37 -50 -12 -29 -10 -49 21 -204 19 -94 39 -189 45 -210 14 -50 54 -80 110 -80 34 0 48 6 76 34 21 21 34 44 34 59 0 14 -18 113 -40 219 -37 178 -43 195 -70 221 -36 32 -101 37 -139 11z\"\/><path d=\"M1163 3073 c-36 -7 -73 -59 -73 -102 0 -56 133 -378 171 -413 34 -32 83 -37 129 -13 70 36 67 87 -16 290 -86 209 -89 214 -129 231 -35 14 -42 15 -82 7z\"\/><path d=\"M3689 3066 c-15 -9 -33 -30 -42 -48 -48 -103 -147 -355 -147 -375 0 -98 131 -148 192 -74 13 15 57 108 97 206 80 196 84 226 37 273 -30 30 -99 39 -137 18z\"\/><path d=\"M583 2784 c-38 -19 -67 -74 -58 -113 9 -42 211 -354 242 -373 16 -10 45 -18 66 -18 51 0 107 52 107 100 0 39 -1 41 -124 234 -80 126 -108 162 -133 173 -41 17 -61 16 -100 -3z\"\/><path d=\"M4250 2784 c-14 -9 -74 -91 -133 -183 -95 -150 -107 -173 -107 -213 0 -55 33 -94 87 -104 67 -13 90 8 211 198 130 202 137 225 78 284 -27 27 -42 34 -72 34 -22 0 -50 -8 -64 -16z\"\/><path d=\"M2275 2693 c-553 -48 -1095 -270 -1585 -649 -135 -104 -459 -423 -483 -476 -23 -49 -22 -139 2 -186 73 -142 361 -457 571 -626 285 -228 642 -407 990 -497 242 -63 336 -73 660 -74 310 0 370 5 595 52 535 111 1045 392 1455 803 122 121 250 273 275 326 19 41 19 137 0 174 -41 79 -309 363 -465 492 -447 370 -946 591 -1479 653 -113 14 -422 18 -536 8z m395 -428 c171 -34 330 -124 456 -258 112 -119 167 -219 211 -378 27 -96 24 -300 -5 -401 -72 -255 -236 -447 -474 -557 -132 -62 -201 -76 -368 -76 -167 0 -236 14 -368 76 -213 98 -373 271 -451 485 -162 444 86 934 547 1084 153 49 292 57 452 25z m909 -232 c222 -123 408 -262 593 -441 76 -74 138 -139 138 -144 0 -16 -233 -242 -330 -319 -155 -123 -309 -223 -461 -299 l-81 -41 32 46 c18 26 49 83 70 128 143 306 141 649 -6 957 -25 52 -61 116 -79 142 l-34 47 45 -20 c26 -10 76 -36 113 -56z m-2057 25 c-40 -58 -105 -190 -130 -263 -110 -324 -59 -707 132 -981 25 -35 42 -64 37 -64 -19 0 -241 119 -326 174 -188 122 -406 314 -532 468 l-58 71 108 103 c185 178 428 349 672 473 66 33 121 60 123 61 2 0 -10 -19 -26 -42z\"\/><path d=\"M2375 1950 c-198 -44 -350 -190 -395 -379 -18 -76 -8 -221 19 -290 114 -284 457 -406 731 -260 98 52 188 154 231 260 27 69 37 214 19 290 -38 163 -166 304 -326 360 -67 23 -215 33 -279 19z\"\/><\/g><\/svg><\/i> <img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" alt=\"Loading\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dev95.site\/wp-content\/plugins\/page-views-count\/ajax-loader-2x.gif?resize=16%2C16&#038;ssl=1\" border=\"0\" \/><\/p><div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By the Author \/ Source: abuaram.site These days, I recall my suicide attempt that took place several years ago. It was my first attempt, even though suicidal thoughts had crossed my mind&#8230;<\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>\n<p id=\"pvc_stats_1052\" class=\"pvc_stats total_only\" data-element-id=\"1052\" style=\"\"><i class=\"pvc-stats-icon medium\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" version=\"1.0\" viewbox=\"0 0 502 315\" preserveaspectratio=\"xMidYMid meet\"><g transform=\"translate(0,332) scale(0.1,-0.1)\" fill=\"\" stroke=\"none\"><path d=\"M2394 3279 l-29 -30 -3 -207 c-2 -182 0 -211 15 -242 39 -76 157 -76 196 0 15 31 17 60 15 243 l-3 209 -33 29 c-26 23 -41 29 -80 29 -41 0 -53 -5 -78 -31z\"\/><path d=\"M3085 3251 c-45 -19 -58 -50 -96 -229 -47 -217 -49 -260 -13 -295 52 -53 146 -42 177 20 16 31 87 366 87 410 0 70 -86 122 -155 94z\"\/><path d=\"M1751 3234 c-13 -9 -29 -31 -37 -50 -12 -29 -10 -49 21 -204 19 -94 39 -189 45 -210 14 -50 54 -80 110 -80 34 0 48 6 76 34 21 21 34 44 34 59 0 14 -18 113 -40 219 -37 178 -43 195 -70 221 -36 32 -101 37 -139 11z\"\/><path d=\"M1163 3073 c-36 -7 -73 -59 -73 -102 0 -56 133 -378 171 -413 34 -32 83 -37 129 -13 70 36 67 87 -16 290 -86 209 -89 214 -129 231 -35 14 -42 15 -82 7z\"\/><path d=\"M3689 3066 c-15 -9 -33 -30 -42 -48 -48 -103 -147 -355 -147 -375 0 -98 131 -148 192 -74 13 15 57 108 97 206 80 196 84 226 37 273 -30 30 -99 39 -137 18z\"\/><path d=\"M583 2784 c-38 -19 -67 -74 -58 -113 9 -42 211 -354 242 -373 16 -10 45 -18 66 -18 51 0 107 52 107 100 0 39 -1 41 -124 234 -80 126 -108 162 -133 173 -41 17 -61 16 -100 -3z\"\/><path d=\"M4250 2784 c-14 -9 -74 -91 -133 -183 -95 -150 -107 -173 -107 -213 0 -55 33 -94 87 -104 67 -13 90 8 211 198 130 202 137 225 78 284 -27 27 -42 34 -72 34 -22 0 -50 -8 -64 -16z\"\/><path d=\"M2275 2693 c-553 -48 -1095 -270 -1585 -649 -135 -104 -459 -423 -483 -476 -23 -49 -22 -139 2 -186 73 -142 361 -457 571 -626 285 -228 642 -407 990 -497 242 -63 336 -73 660 -74 310 0 370 5 595 52 535 111 1045 392 1455 803 122 121 250 273 275 326 19 41 19 137 0 174 -41 79 -309 363 -465 492 -447 370 -946 591 -1479 653 -113 14 -422 18 -536 8z m395 -428 c171 -34 330 -124 456 -258 112 -119 167 -219 211 -378 27 -96 24 -300 -5 -401 -72 -255 -236 -447 -474 -557 -132 -62 -201 -76 -368 -76 -167 0 -236 14 -368 76 -213 98 -373 271 -451 485 -162 444 86 934 547 1084 153 49 292 57 452 25z m909 -232 c222 -123 408 -262 593 -441 76 -74 138 -139 138 -144 0 -16 -233 -242 -330 -319 -155 -123 -309 -223 -461 -299 l-81 -41 32 46 c18 26 49 83 70 128 143 306 141 649 -6 957 -25 52 -61 116 -79 142 l-34 47 45 -20 c26 -10 76 -36 113 -56z m-2057 25 c-40 -58 -105 -190 -130 -263 -110 -324 -59 -707 132 -981 25 -35 42 -64 37 -64 -19 0 -241 119 -326 174 -188 122 -406 314 -532 468 l-58 71 108 103 c185 178 428 349 672 473 66 33 121 60 123 61 2 0 -10 -19 -26 -42z\"\/><path d=\"M2375 1950 c-198 -44 -350 -190 -395 -379 -18 -76 -8 -221 19 -290 114 -284 457 -406 731 -260 98 52 188 154 231 260 27 69 37 214 19 290 -38 163 -166 304 -326 360 -67 23 -215 33 -279 19z\"\/><\/g><\/svg><\/i> <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" alt=\"Loading\" src=\"https:\/\/dev95.site\/wp-content\/plugins\/page-views-count\/ajax-loader-2x.gif\" border=\"0\" \/><\/p>\n<div class=\"pvc_clear\"><\/div>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fp_fajr_begins":"","fp_fajr_iqamah":"","fp_dhuhr_begins":"","fp_dhuhr_iqamah":"","fp_asr_begins":"","fp_asr_iqamah":"","fp_maghrib_begins":"","fp_maghrib_iqamah":"","fp_isha_begins":"","fp_isha_iqamah":"","fp_midnight":"","fp_midnight_name":"","fp_sunrise":"","fp_single_prayer_begins_title":"","fp_single_prayer_iqamah_title":"","fp_prayer_times_for_today":"","fp_hijra_date":"","fp_fajr_name":"","fp_dhuhr_name":"","fp_asr_name":"","fp_maghrib_name":"","fp_isha_name":"","fp_sunrise_name":"","fp_currentDate":"","fp_current_time":"","fp_current_title":"","fp_current_location":"","fp_masjid_name":"","fp_prayer_title":"","fp_next_prayer_iqamah_time":"","fp_next_prayer_iqamah_title":"","fp_next_prayer_begins_time":"","fp_next_prayer_begins_title":"","fp_next_prayer_title":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[37],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1052","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-posts"],"a3_pvc":{"activated":true,"total_views":14,"today_views":0},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication - Dev95<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"These days, I recall my suicide attempt that took place several years ago. It was my first attempt, even though suicidal thoughts had crossed my mind at many points in my life. Nevertheless, that was the only time I actually went through with it.On the day I attempted suicide, I had been off my psychiatric medication for a while. I was suffering from chronic schizophrenia at the time, and my mental state was severely deteriorating; numerous voices were whispering to me, both around me and within me. I was living in a world completely detached from reality, consumed by overwhelming feelings of deep depression, with advanced symptoms of schizophrenia at their absolute peak.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ar_AR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication - Dev95\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"These days, I recall my suicide attempt that took place several years ago. It was my first attempt, even though suicidal thoughts had crossed my mind at many points in my life. Nevertheless, that was the only time I actually went through with it.On the day I attempted suicide, I had been off my psychiatric medication for a while. I was suffering from chronic schizophrenia at the time, and my mental state was severely deteriorating; numerous voices were whispering to me, both around me and within me. I was living in a world completely detached from reality, consumed by overwhelming feelings of deep depression, with advanced symptoms of schizophrenia at their absolute peak.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Dev95\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-07-31T11:47:09+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-07-31T11:47:21+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"MOHAMMAD\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"\u0643\u064f\u062a\u0628 \u0628\u0648\u0627\u0633\u0637\u0629\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"MOHAMMAD\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"\u0648\u0642\u062a \u0627\u0644\u0642\u0631\u0627\u0621\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u0645\u064f\u0642\u062f\u0651\u0631\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 \u062f\u0642\u0627\u0626\u0642\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"MOHAMMAD\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/b807805ffe2916206b04d0938bce0298\"},\"headline\":\"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-07-31T11:47:09+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-07-31T11:47:21+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":977,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#organization\"},\"articleSection\":[\"Posts\"],\"inLanguage\":\"ar\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/\",\"name\":\"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication - Dev95\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2026-07-31T11:47:09+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-07-31T11:47:21+00:00\",\"description\":\"These days, I recall my suicide attempt that took place several years ago. It was my first attempt, even though suicidal thoughts had crossed my mind at many points in my life. Nevertheless, that was the only time I actually went through with it.On the day I attempted suicide, I had been off my psychiatric medication for a while. I was suffering from chronic schizophrenia at the time, and my mental state was severely deteriorating; numerous voices were whispering to me, both around me and within me. I was living in a world completely detached from reality, consumed by overwhelming feelings of deep depression, with advanced symptoms of schizophrenia at their absolute peak.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"ar\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/\",\"name\":\"Dev95\",\"description\":\"\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"ar\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Dev95\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"ar\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/logo\\\/image\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/i0.wp.com\\\/dev95.site\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/07\\\/cropped-rbrrbr-1-2.png?fit=100%2C34&ssl=1\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/i0.wp.com\\\/dev95.site\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/07\\\/cropped-rbrrbr-1-2.png?fit=100%2C34&ssl=1\",\"width\":100,\"height\":34,\"caption\":\"Dev95\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/logo\\\/image\\\/\"}},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/b807805ffe2916206b04d0938bce0298\",\"name\":\"MOHAMMAD\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"ar\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/a70a73d950838b20cd80d7ebdc955737e802e8cd896044c5473b32b946c0662a?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/a70a73d950838b20cd80d7ebdc955737e802e8cd896044c5473b32b946c0662a?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/a70a73d950838b20cd80d7ebdc955737e802e8cd896044c5473b32b946c0662a?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"MOHAMMAD\"},\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/dev95.site\\\/ar\\\/author\\\/mohammad\\\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication - Dev95","description":"These days, I recall my suicide attempt that took place several years ago. It was my first attempt, even though suicidal thoughts had crossed my mind at many points in my life. Nevertheless, that was the only time I actually went through with it.On the day I attempted suicide, I had been off my psychiatric medication for a while. I was suffering from chronic schizophrenia at the time, and my mental state was severely deteriorating; numerous voices were whispering to me, both around me and within me. I was living in a world completely detached from reality, consumed by overwhelming feelings of deep depression, with advanced symptoms of schizophrenia at their absolute peak.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/","og_locale":"ar_AR","og_type":"article","og_title":"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication - Dev95","og_description":"These days, I recall my suicide attempt that took place several years ago. It was my first attempt, even though suicidal thoughts had crossed my mind at many points in my life. Nevertheless, that was the only time I actually went through with it.On the day I attempted suicide, I had been off my psychiatric medication for a while. I was suffering from chronic schizophrenia at the time, and my mental state was severely deteriorating; numerous voices were whispering to me, both around me and within me. I was living in a world completely detached from reality, consumed by overwhelming feelings of deep depression, with advanced symptoms of schizophrenia at their absolute peak.","og_url":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/","og_site_name":"Dev95","article_published_time":"2026-07-31T11:47:09+00:00","article_modified_time":"2026-07-31T11:47:21+00:00","author":"MOHAMMAD","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"\u0643\u064f\u062a\u0628 \u0628\u0648\u0627\u0633\u0637\u0629":"MOHAMMAD","\u0648\u0642\u062a \u0627\u0644\u0642\u0631\u0627\u0621\u0629 \u0627\u0644\u0645\u064f\u0642\u062f\u0651\u0631":"5 \u062f\u0642\u0627\u0626\u0642"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/"},"author":{"name":"MOHAMMAD","@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#\/schema\/person\/b807805ffe2916206b04d0938bce0298"},"headline":"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication","datePublished":"2026-07-31T11:47:09+00:00","dateModified":"2026-07-31T11:47:21+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/"},"wordCount":977,"commentCount":0,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#organization"},"articleSection":["Posts"],"inLanguage":"ar","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/","url":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/","name":"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication - Dev95","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#website"},"datePublished":"2026-07-31T11:47:09+00:00","dateModified":"2026-07-31T11:47:21+00:00","description":"These days, I recall my suicide attempt that took place several years ago. It was my first attempt, even though suicidal thoughts had crossed my mind at many points in my life. Nevertheless, that was the only time I actually went through with it.On the day I attempted suicide, I had been off my psychiatric medication for a while. I was suffering from chronic schizophrenia at the time, and my mental state was severely deteriorating; numerous voices were whispering to me, both around me and within me. I was living in a world completely detached from reality, consumed by overwhelming feelings of deep depression, with advanced symptoms of schizophrenia at their absolute peak.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"ar","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/the-trap-of-unconsciousness-a-night-of-suicide-bittersweet-regret-and-the-lifeline-of-medication\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"The Trap of Unconsciousness: A Night of Suicide, Bittersweet Regret, and the Lifeline of Medication"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#website","url":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/","name":"Dev95","description":"","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"ar"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#organization","name":"Dev95","url":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"ar","@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dev95.site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/cropped-rbrrbr-1-2.png?fit=100%2C34&ssl=1","contentUrl":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dev95.site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/cropped-rbrrbr-1-2.png?fit=100%2C34&ssl=1","width":100,"height":34,"caption":"Dev95"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"}},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/#\/schema\/person\/b807805ffe2916206b04d0938bce0298","name":"MOHAMMAD","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"ar","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/a70a73d950838b20cd80d7ebdc955737e802e8cd896044c5473b32b946c0662a?s=96&d=mm&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/a70a73d950838b20cd80d7ebdc955737e802e8cd896044c5473b32b946c0662a?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/a70a73d950838b20cd80d7ebdc955737e802e8cd896044c5473b32b946c0662a?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"MOHAMMAD"},"url":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/author\/mohammad\/"}]}},"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1052","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1052"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1052\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1053,"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1052\/revisions\/1053"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1052"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1052"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev95.site\/ar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1052"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}