By the Author / Source: abuaram.site
When someone falls to the rock bottom of illness, returning to a completely normal state becomes difficult—if not impossible. A part of them will remain sick under all circumstances and through every form of treatment. Treatment may succeed in reducing the suffering, but it will never be a magical solution that restores hope for a completely normal life.
So, let us not build hope for an entirely different life, nor aspire to achievements beyond our reach. I do not mean to discourage you or dampen your spirits regarding treatment; but as a person who is ill and has touched rock bottom, returning somewhere else is no easy task. This is the nature of psychiatric treatment: it alleviates your suffering, leaving you to accept the reality of your fate and learn to live with it.
Treatment will not turn you into someone else, nor will it cure you fully into a completely “normal” human being—after all, no fully normal human exists in this life. Treatment eases your pain and reduces the severity of your illness, but having touched the bottom, you will never be entirely normal again.
Try if you must, but you may not find what pleases you. I am not stopping you from trying; I only fear that you might lose sight of where you stand, only to relapse, break down, and suffer again by yearning for what you cannot reach. It is easy to think that illness is the sole problem in this damned life, but profound problems exist for everyone, even the most “normal” people. Life’s challenges are not confined to your illness and treatment alone; they belong to life as a whole.
Normal people understand life’s complexities and troubles all too well. Life is intricate and full of hardship; every individual struggles with their own perspective on life and the things they fail to achieve within it. It is not just about you being an ill person who sees peaks reached by others and feels they are impossible for you. You may long for a beautiful wife who loves you, yet fail to find her; you may desire wealth, seeing others possess it while it remains out of your reach due to your condition.
Yet those “normal” people did not acquire these things easily either, despite not being ill like you. They, too, struggle to find that beautiful partner—with a stunning body and genuine affection—to love and be loved by, sharing happy moments together. They have endured immense complexities to reach where they are, even without your illness!
In light of this, I no longer wish for a life beyond my capacity. My current life is enough, and so is my treatment, which relieves a significant portion of my suffering. I know I will never become a different person on any given day. The illness that pulled me to the bottom still keeps a part of me sick, and I cannot fix everything just to become someone else.
At the same time, I am proud of the nature of my life’s fate and feel no sense of inadequacy. I know my mind and myself very well, and I know how truly valuable they are to me amidst my illness and this life. I appreciate myself, love who I am, honor my suffering, and respect my ambitions and hard work. I take pride in my refined taste, my intellectual abilities, and the things I dedicate myself to.
Despite every bad thing, and despite every symptom that added weight to my shoulders, I have been—and still am—paving my way well through life. I may stray off course briefly, but I always return to the path I love. Amidst all this burden and life’s intricate complications, I find continuity in pursuing what I truly love and desire.
Some patients may simply long for basic rights that feel impossible to attain, such as finding love or a beautiful, attractive wife. These are indeed basic rights, yet they seem so complex. Perhaps they truly deserve to have them—for every human deserves to love and be loved; every human deserves that warm, gentle, yet passionate embrace, alongside a warm home and a family. Try to reach for them.
Right now, I am happy because I have eliminated a large part of my suffering by committing to a good, suitable treatment regimen. I can feel comfort and stability. I can maintain a clear mind and remain calm when facing life’s problems and complexities, enjoying my life away from the noise and symptoms of illness. I am grateful to have effective medication today.
That is why we must all find the right treatment for ourselves. We need to discover what works for us, define who we want to be, and hold on to what we love. Even if we do not change magically, partial relief is far better than unmitigated illness. Eliminating a layer of suffering is a profound accomplishment, and with a bit of luck, it may pave the way for a more comfortable and better life.
Ultimately, my life is wonderful as it is. I have found good treatment and achieved a high level of awareness. Having lived with illness for many years, removing some of its weight feels deeply comforting. My goal is to maintain this state and live happily. I desire more love, happiness, and joy—nothing bad, and nothing beyond this. I simply hope for everything to be good, and I am profoundly grateful to have realized this, understood my illness, and overcome all that pain. I hope everyone finds the right remedy to ease their suffering, allowing them to focus on good things with peace, stability, and genuine happiness.
